Are you as fat as a whale?

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Are you as fat as a whale? is a News Bulletin posted to the Commerce and Communications Network in 2790. It does not impact commodity prices.


Are you as fat as a whale?
Do you find yourself getting wedged in armchairs?
Do you have to eat solidly for four hours before you even start to feel full? If the answer to all these questions is YES, then you could win fame and fortune as this year's Mr. Fatman Champion! For the measly sum of 100 creds, you can enter the preliminary rounds, where you'll be asked to:
Drink a bucket of warm lard
Participate in the feared Pie Marathon
Eat a live gnu
Don't delay - apply today!