I need divine assistance (or Christians)

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Um, try going over it with a fellow Christian and pray a lot about it. But no, there are no "Cliff Notes" for the Bible that are really that good IMO.
 
Bible cliff notes:

Earth is created. People piss God off. God kills people. People continue to piss God off, God threatens to kill people again.

Oh yeah and there's something in there about the son of God but it sort of trails off and goes nowhere. :p
 
Mav23 said:
Bible cliff notes:

Earth is created. People piss God off. God kills people. People continue to piss God off, God threatens to kill people again.

Oh yeah and there's something in there about... yadda, yadda, yadda...

Um....no.

It's more like this:

1) God LOVES mankind and offers a wonderful plan for our lives.
2) Mankind is SINFUL and SEPARATED from God. Therefore, he cannot know and experience God's love and plan for his life.
3) Jesus Christ is God's ONLY provision for man's sin. Through Him you can know and experience God's love and plan for your life.
4) We must individually RECEIVE Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord; then we can know and experience God's love and plan for our lives.

(Thx to the late Bill Bright...)

That's the (Christian) Bible in a nutshell. Sure, there's a lotta details given, but that's what the whole work boils down to...

Indeed, far from "going nowhere", the centerpiece of it all is the gospels, and the word gospel is the ancient Greek term for "good news".

Interesting fact (sadly, many Christians aren't even aware of this): In one form or another, Christ is present in all 66 books of the Bible. For example, he is the ultimate fulfillment of the "Passover Lamb" seen in Exodus, etc. ...
 
I"m a catholic, and usually pretty cautious of religious discussion with people i don't know. OFtentimes non catholics are pretty hostile and i often don't agree (but i do agree sometimes) with non catholics. Of course i know nothing about Preacher, granted. But he's pretty much right. MOst people (and unfortunately too many catholics view the bible the same way, way too many) see the bible as such: Old Testament=>God of wrath
New Testament=>God of love
this is an overly simplified, uneducated view. In teh old testament there are passages which show God's complete love for his people. Just like the new testament has its share of vengeance.
the view most people (again too many catholics, very sad) hold is uneducated crap that they heard from someone they thought was smart. All people have to do is read the bible. It isn't as contradictory as people like to say it is if you actually read some of it and understand the history, the language, the beauty, as well as the theology.
I'm also a devout follower of science (a math major with a decent background in physics) Reason is one solid view of the truth, however is uncomplete. We need revalation as well. The two complement each other. Two opposite views of hte universe are needed for us to make sense of what the hell is going on.
 
Science is the study of the world around us and the search to understand it.
I love science, I read a crapload of books on physics, and have taken more than twenty hours of physics classes, i know what science is.
and 80% of physicists have some sort of religious beliefs.
Don't insult my intelligence.
 
dextorboot said:
Something tells me that nothing you guys said helped the guy on his test. But at least you tried.
dude, the guy's test is long over by now.

BTW, Bob, how'd you do on said test?...

steampunk said:
I can't believe you said that. Someone needs to relearn what science is.

Zarathustra said:
Science is the study of the world around us and the search to understand it.
I love science, I read a crapload of books on physics, and have taken more than twenty hours of physics classes, i know what science is.
and 80% of physicists have some sort of religious beliefs.
Don't insult my intelligence.

Yo, Z:

He was referrin' to the adjective "devout" in yer post, I believe...

BTW, I agree w/ you RE: yer comments about the Bible/Christian faith...
 
I got a 94%. All right, I think.

Some of the other students' answers were funny ("What was the name of the Apostle who betrayed Christ?" "Charles"; "What can we learn from the Garden of Eden?" "Why Men and women become one in body and soul; Why men don't have babies")

I can't believe you said that. Someone needs to relearn what science is

No, if he said "Creationism is a valid scientific principle", then he'd have to relearn what Science is.
 
Preacher said:
Um....no.

It's more like this:

1) God LOVES mankind and offers a wonderful plan for our lives.
2) Mankind is SINFUL and SEPARATED from God. Therefore, he cannot know and experience God's love and plan for his life.
3) Jesus Christ is God's ONLY provision for man's sin. Through Him you can know and experience God's love and plan for your life.
4) We must individually RECEIVE Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord; then we can know and experience God's love and plan for our lives.

(Thx to the late Bill Bright...)

That's the (Christian) Bible in a nutshell. Sure, there's a lotta details given, but that's what the whole work boils down to...

Indeed, far from "going nowhere", the centerpiece of it all is the gospels, and the word gospel is the ancient Greek term for "good news".

Interesting fact (sadly, many Christians aren't even aware of this): In one form or another, Christ is present in all 66 books of the Bible. For example, he is the ultimate fulfillment of the "Passover Lamb" seen in Exodus, etc. ...


Do you have to kill EVERY joke I make? :(
 
Preacher wouldn't know a joke if it bit him in the ass.

Or attacked and mauled his face, eating his eyes and sinus cavities.
 
Bob McDob said:
Some of the other students' answers were funny... "Why Men and women become one in body and soul; Why men don't have babies"
Funny?, mebbe, but ironically enuff, the two I quoted you about above are made quite clear in Genesis...

Mav23 said:
Do you have to kill EVERY joke I make?

No, only the ones that mock my Lord & Savior; I'm kinda passionate about that, 'specially when people's souls may hang in the balance...
Any other jokes, by contrast, are strictly optional...

LeHah said:
Preacher wouldn't know a joke if it bit him in the ass...
Claro que no, bub.
It's just that some things aren't laughing matters (see above reply)...
 
dextorboot said:
And settle down Beavis, even God has a sense of humor. :)
Which explains why we have the CZ. And cats, and lawyers, and the theory of evolution, among other things...
 
Stop insulting MY beliefs. How dare you insult the great scientists of history by pointing out flaws in your.... oh nevermind, I'm not as good at this as Preacher.
 
Preacher said:
Which explains why we have the CZ. And cats, and lawyers, and the theory of evolution, among other things...

Yeah dude, those are all real funny. Everytime I think about cats I just can't stop laughing. Go God, what a riot. Woohoo.

Mav, you have to be some kinda special to be as good as Preach over there.
 
dextorboot said:
Mav, you have to be some kinda special to be as good as Preach over there.

My mommy says I'm special... and my teachers.... and my friends.... :(
 
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