Hahah, that's a great story, Frosty. Please put your penis in my mouth. I love it. I will slobber all over your throbbing cock because that's what I do.
As for mine, it didn't actually happen to me, but the lieutenant's story reminded me of it.
I was probably 15-16 years old, and me and the other geeks were playing nerdy soccer in school when one of the sturdier kids kicked the ball and hit me smack in the nose, causing major bleeding of the head-lightening kind. After a few hasty "I'm fine"s I ran to the toilet while trying to explain my situation to all the kids staring, and for some reason I went into a stall for paper rather than the dispenser next to the sink, most likely because the latter was empty. I pulled out a wad of it and pressed against my nose (which in retrospect doesn't seem like terribly smart use of public-toilet paper), and sort of waited around for the bleeding to stop...
I can't remember how long I was in there, but I somehow managed to get blood all over the place... walls, bowl, celing, tank, you name it; it looked like something out of a Silent Hill game. When it finally stopped, I threw the paper in the toilet and flushed, then went to the sink and washed myself. Just when I'd finished, this little kid, probably 13 or something came in and headed for the stall I'd been in. I was like "Uh, you might not want to go in there," so of course he had to check it out and went in. Very shortly after he re-emerged, white as a sheet, muttering a weak "Okay" before leaving, apparently having forgotten about whatever it was he came for.
I have no idea if that was the creepiest thing to ever happen to that kid, but judging from his face, it was up there.