Making the Games: Wing Commander 2 Story Pitch (August 11, 2012)

Bandit LOAF

Long Live the Confederation!
Here was have Ellen Guon and Stephen Beeman's original script/pitch for "Wing Commander II: Cloak and Dagger," written in November 1990 shortly after the release of the first game. It's Vengeance of the Kilrathi, for sure, but it's Vengeance of the Kilrathi writ large... with many more elaborate scenes and ideas that didn't make it to the finished game. There are too many highlights to list, so let me just mention this: players get to watch a reporter talking about the state of the war between missions... a reporter that Tolwyn eventually punches in the face!

We apologize for the quality of the three Wing Commander 2 documents. We're hoping to have proper scans (or typed versions) available soon. But they're too cool to wait for!



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Original update published on August 11, 2012
 
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I believe the 'Cloak and Dagger' name got re-used for the title of WC2's opening theme.

Knowing what happens to the Claw, the farewell party for the familiar names is obviously meant to show they didn't die when she got all blown up. The WC1 scenes never got re-used because it consumed too much additional disk space for the relatively short time they'd be used, right? I tend to find it a nice thing when games re-use material from their predecessors, provided they don't form the majority of the new game, so it's a shame technological limitations got in the way of that happening here.

Heh: Wing Commander II, programmed by two guys we haven't even hired yet. Hilarious.

Interesting that the focus of ISS duties seem to be fighting pirates. Would make the opening WC2 missions the first time we fighter humans, instead of the mutineers in SO1 or pirates in Privateer.

I understand they're trying to bring the old WC1 cast in as early as possible, but it seems odd that Maniac is assigned to a humble police carrier just to bring him to 'Captain OurHero'. Actually, it's a bit funny that the ISS would have carriers at all - a static installation like Gwynedd Star Base makes much more sense. Also seems strange that the ISS would have bombers available - they'd be more valuable on front-line ships.

I suppose it makes sense that they cut the first act aboard the ISS carrier - having the player form bonds with the pilots there, only to break them off and send him/her to the Concordia would be a bit jarring.

I think it might have been mentioned on #wingnut, but the idea about Angel 'if you don't care for anyone, you won't feel pain when they die', seems to have been brought back in the movie.

Kill Jazz or capture? May well be the first instance of a player having such a direct influence on the story, before WC3.

I want to know how/why Tolwyn breaks Jerry Rivers' nose...

Hmm, the second act seems a bit short - I suppose it's a half/half deal: half of the game with the ISS, half of the game on the Concordia. I think it worked out better that the majority of the game was aboard the the Concordia.

Fun read, not too long. Get reading, if you haven't already.
 
I see this starts with Bluehair and Hunter flying a single easy mission from the Tiger's Claw. I think it was inevitable that this would be cut - too many single-use art assets. However, it's interesting to see the idea written down in 1990. These days, perhaps every second game starts with a mission like this as its tutorial. You're well-equipped, surrounded by allies and it's all just peachy. Then the mission ends with a scripted failure, and you spend the rest of the game recovering from that failure.

I'm surprised to see the traitor plotline so complete. In comparison, Thrakhath seems to be an afterthought, while the nature of the final mission is left undecided.

When this script was written, had any aspects of the WC2 engine (especially bombers and torpedoes) been implemented? Probably not, judging by the draft credits.

Written by Stephen Beeman and Ellen Guon
Programmed by Two Guys We Haven't Even Hired Yet
Art by Denis Loubet and Glen Johnson
Soundtrack by the Fat Man
Produced by Jeff Johannigman
Directed by Stephen Beeman

It's nice to see they had such confidence in their artists and composer, though.

There are some heavy-handed scripted in-mission events and assumptions about the player's flight style. I'm glad these were left out.

MINX: Stay out of my way, Ourhero.
BLUEHAIR: What are you talking about?
MINX: Kills! I only scored X, while you scored Y. I'm entitled to my shared of the bad guys.

FLY MISSION 2-B - escort Paladin out of the system, track a Kilrathi destroyer, but can't get close enough to engage

FLY MISSION 2-C - Maniac steals your kills, ducking in at the last mission to fire the final shots

Bluehair, bitching about flying a bomber when what he wants to fly is a hot fighter again.

On the other hand, it would have been neat to see this event implemented within the flight engine, instead of being described by Stingray afterwards.

FLY MISSION 6-A - Dallas' fighter begins to malfunction seriously during this mission. First the tactical computer, then his shields, then communications... he dies during his last communique to Bluehair.
 
It's nice to see they had such confidence in their artists and composer, though.
They had already proven themselves in Wing Commander I, I would think.

There are some heavy-handed scripted in-mission events and assumptions about the player's flight style. I'm glad these were left out.
Minx's complaining: I was wondering about that, whether it would only trigger if Blair got more kills than Minx, which may not always be the case.

Mission 2-B: I didn't see this as a 'heavy-handed' assumption. My guess is that the ship would register at a very great distance, then disappear. A bit like the first appearance of the Sivar in SM1.

Bomber complaints: Definitely wouldn't like this one, especially after Sandman's complaints about the same in Saga.
 
Interesting that the focus of ISS duties seem to be fighting pirates. Would make the opening WC2 missions the first time we fighter humans, instead of the mutineers in SO1 or pirates in Privateer.

Something lost in WC2 as published is just what ISS does. Having a ship called the Robert Peel makes it clear that yes, you're the police force. Not that naming a spacecraft after an 800-year-old politician is likely, unless the ISS is really out of touch with current events. On the plus side, many conversations in the draft script emphasise the difference between the CSS and ISS, giving signicance to Bluehair's eventual transfer to the Concordia. When I first played WC2, that transfer seemed perfunctory. So yes, it would have been nice if they kept that significance, even if characters and other assets had to be discarded.

Kill Jazz or capture? May well be the first instance of a player having such a direct influence on the story, before WC3.

Privateer did implement in-mission communication choices, but I don't think any of them are meaningful. Does anyone know if the developers had deeper plans for those? A choice that remains is to destroy the Steltek Scout before it upgrades your gun, then spend the rest of your life being tormented by the Steltek Drone. Grim, but more consistent with Grayson Burrows' character than the "correct" ending...

Hmm, the second act seems a bit short - I suppose it's a half/half deal: half of the game with the ISS, half of the game on the Concordia. I think it worked out better that the majority of the game was aboard the the Concordia.

The first parts of the script are described in more detail than the ending. Act I ends with Blair's transfer in series 3 or 4. Act II ends with series 14! While you wouldn't see all series in a single play-through, the majority of the game would still be aboard the Concordia.

Mission 2-B: I didn't see this as a 'heavy-handed' assumption. My guess is that the ship would register at a very great distance, then disappear. A bit like the first appearance of the Sivar in SM1.

Sure, the programmers can make it happen. If it leads to later awesomeness, I'll accept it as a necessary evil. However, in the script as written it just seems to exist so Laramie has a guaranteed excuse to chew out the player. The event is good scriptwriting - it gives Bluehair some character development - but bad game design. How many WC3 players kept replaying the final Behemoth escort mission in an attempt to save it?

Bomber complaints: Definitely wouldn't like this one, especially after Sandman's complaints about the same in Saga.

Yes, in WC2 I find the Broadsword missions easiest. In Saga I found the Longbow second only to the Excalibur, but the conversations stated otherwise.
 
The first parts of the script are described in more detail than the ending. Act I ends with Blair's transfer in series 3 or 4. Act II ends with series 14!
Given that this was an early draft, perhaps they planned on adding more detail to the Concordia series later.
 
Something lost in WC2 as published is just what ISS does. Having a ship called the Robert Peel makes it clear that yes, you're the police force. Not that naming a spacecraft after an 800-year-old politician is likely, unless the ISS is really out of touch with current events. On the plus side, many conversations in the draft script emphasise the difference between the CSS and ISS, giving signicance to Bluehair's eventual transfer to the Concordia. When I first played WC2, that transfer seemed perfunctory. So yes, it would have been nice if they kept that significance, even if characters and other assets had to be discarded.
Well, I guess having a police ship named after Robert Peel is no more out of touch than having an aircraft carrier named after George Washington. Sir Robert Peel's impact on the creation of modern police forces is undeniable, and I'm sure people in police academies of the 27th century still read about him at least in some footnote.

As for the transfer, I think the way it was done in WC2 was ultimately far more sensible. I mean, think about the logic here - Admiral Tolwyn, who does not have Blair serving under him, insists on Blair getting transferred to the ISS to effectively get him out of the Navy... and then, ten years later, he accepts Blair coming onboard his carrier, just because supporting his subordinates' decisions is a part of his character? That's a pretty glaring inconsistency. It's far better to have it done the way WC2 ultimately did - Blair has to land onboard the Concordia, and because the ship is about to jump out, there's no time to put him back. Essentially, Blair gets shanghaied onboard - and there is a great deal of tension stemming from the fact that at first, Tolwyn has to put up with Blair... but he might send him off at the first opportunity.
 
It's nice to see they had such confidence in their artists and composer, though.

It's more interesting which name ISN'T on that list: Chris Roberts. Chris ultimately did produce the game instead of Jeff Johannigman.

Interesting that the focus of ISS duties seem to be fighting pirates. Would make the opening WC2 missions the first time we fighter humans, instead of the mutineers in SO1 or pirates in Privateer.

One of Spirit's lines in The Secret Missions suggests that you may have been meant to have been fighting humans when you went against the Gwenhyvar. ("What if [her fiance] has been captured, like those poor souls aboard the Gwenhyar? Captured, adn forced to betray his own people over an over again?")
 
I forgot about that. I took that to mean they were forced to work elsewhere, but there may well have been some left aboard the Gwenhyver. The Rapiers would have been flown by Kilrathi, of course, but it's quite possible some were on the destroyer as well. Still, all of those ships were ultimately controlled by the Kilrathi. I was thinking of Humans willingly fighting against Blair, as we first saw in Special Operations 1.

Blair has to land onboard the Concordia, and because the ship is about to jump out, there's no time to put him back.
I think the way it was ultimately presented does indeed make more sense. The only way Blair could make it aboard the carrier is for there to have been an emergency of some sort. Tolwyn would not have allowed the transfer if this wasn't the case.
 
I've transcribed the Art and Character files and I'm in act 2 ot the script. When I finish the scirpt and the ships I'll send them to you for profing. I'm also 3/4 the way throught the WC3. I know we have the text but I'm formating it like the scanned document.
 
Hey Wedge! How's it going?

I have most of them done honestly except P2 and Prophecy I just don't have time to game test them nor do I know anybody who would want to. WC1&2 take about ten playthroughs per mission to check every variation. It's a real pain.
 
I've transcribed the Art and Character files and I'm in act 2 ot the script. When I finish the scirpt and the ships I'll send them to you for profing. I'm also 3/4 the way throught the WC3. I know we have the text but I'm formating it like the scanned document.

Thanks much. Let me know if anything is illegible and I'll try to arrange for a new photograph.
 
Script is done. Now for ships. Hey Loaf. I'd like to do two versions of this if possible. Do you have the 3D models of all the ships that you could get? An image of top, front, side, and three dimensional would be great.
 
I do have the 3D models, but I don't have any 3D package to render them in. :) They're available on the CIC if anyone would like to try.

Can you send me the text you've done? I'd like to pass it along to Ellen Guon in the hopes of having her say a few words about the project.
 
If someone could that that would be great.
Let me finish the ships and proof read them first.

The starboard armor for the rapier was cut off do you now what it is?
 
Can you send me the text you've done? I'd like to pass it along to Ellen Guon in the hopes of having her say a few words about the project.
Hey, it just occured to me - isn't she actually Ellen Beeman, strictly speaking? I'm pretty sure I came across her website a couple of years back, and it didn't use her maiden name. I think.
 
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