Cz Faq

Bandit LOAF

Bandit LOAF

Long Live the Confederation!
Because we needed one. Add more questions!

LOAF's Big CZ FAQ

Q: Hey, I have a question about tech support! Shouldn't I post it to the General Wing Commander Chat?
A: No, post it to the Tech Support Chat.

Q: Is Blair dead?
A: Look on the bright side: he's *more* dead than any other dead guy.

Q: I think the Border Worlds are really great and that Tolwyn was wrong!
A: Good for you, kiddo.

Q: I think the Border Worlds are horrible and that Tolwyn was right!
A: Good for you, kiddo.

Q: Isn't it cute how I...
... rant about how I love fighters that suck (Epee, Hellcat, Phantom, etc.)?
... like to pretend I'm a Kilrathi?
... think topic drift is really, really funny?
A: No.

Q: What's your favorite fighter?
A: The Green Salthi.

Q: What's your favorite cap-ship?
A: The Green Salthi.

Q: Which Wing Commander girl do you want the most?
A: The Green Salthi.

Q: Is the TCS Lexington from WCIV the same class as the Concordia?
A: No. The Lexington (CV-44) is a 'Concordia class carrier'. The Concordia (CVS-65) is a Confederation class dreadnaught. The Lexington in WCIV is the same ship (with a refit) as the Lexington in Fleet Action. The Lexington from Armada is another super-secret Lexington. The fact that the 'Lex and the Concordia have similar deck plans is a co-inky-dence.

Q: The novel says the Lexington and Vesuvius have *two* bays! Wah!
A: 'Bays' refers to the enclosed areas on the right and left of the ship where all the work is done on fighters.

Q: I'm seeing triple... nien Concordias?!
A: Three ships have been named Concordia:
o TCS Concordia (Action Stations): The 'nameship' of the Concordia class, which later appears in WCIV. This Concordia is destroyed at the end of AS.
o TCS Concordia (Movie): This is the nameship for Concordia class SuperCruisers (TCS Olympus, etc.) It's the one that's referred to in the Kilrathi Saga manual, and it gets gotten rid of sometime before WC2.
o TCS Concordia (CVS-65): This is the Concordia from WC2, a Confederation class Dreadnought. According to Fleet Action, it entered service in 2661.

Q: How do you spell 'dreadnought'?
A: Both 'dreadnought' and 'dreadnaught' are correct.

Q: Why is the frigate bigger than a cruiser? Real frigates are smaller than cruisers!
A: It just is.

Q: Are they going to make another...
... Wing Commander TV show?
... Wing Commander movie?
... Wing Commander game?
A: Maybe.

Q: What about more Wing Commander books?
A: Possible, but unlikely. Baen and Forstchen have both stated that they have no interest... and HarperCollins has no interest in publishing the WC book they already payed for, much less another. Although if the series got really popular again...

Q: Will the series get really popular again?
A: No.

Q: What's the only good Freespace game?
A: A *dead* Freespace game! Also that one where you fly around inside a mountain.

Q: Where's the search feature?!
A: I'll search feature you, jerk.

Q: I need help finding Kilrathi Saga!
A: Kilrathi Saga is very rare -- the best chance you have is to check local used game/thrift stores or to pay around $150 on eBay. You would, however, be better off simply buying the DOS versions of WC1-3 -- since the Win95 conversion of Wing Commander 2 isn't as nice as the original (it's missing some music, has some speed issues and a few odd graphics problems).

Q: EA and Ultima are evil and I hate them forever!
A: Show some restraint. EA is just a company that's trying to make money, and the only evil Ultima was that one where you go to Mars. What the hell was up with that, anyway?

Q: What's this I hear about a 7th CD for Wing Commander IV? Where you fight for Confed?
A: The 'seventh CD' was a rumor born of the fact that the American edition of WCIV had an extra 'slip' for a 7th CD, and the fact that in 1996 everyone was trying to figure out how to fly for Confed for the entire game. This was all compounded by a very funny fake review of the '7th CD' that stupid people took very seriously. There's no 7th CD and you can't fly for Confed throughout WCIV. According to Origin at the time, the extra CD slip was for the demo.

Q: Can I start 20 threads at once?
A: Yes, if you want me to beat you repeatedly with a stick.

Q: I want a pretty custom rank like LeHah's, except less dumb. How do I get one?
A: Anyone with more than 2,000 posts can have their own custom rank.

Q: Ponys and unicorns and anime girls?! THE NEW LAYOUT SUCKS! WHY DID YOU CHANGE IT?
A: We like the new April Fools layout and will be keeping it forever.

Q: What does SpaceBattles suck like?
A: A tube worm.

Q: How big is the Behemoth?
A: It's 11 kilometers long, but nobody knows why.

Q: Is the Kilrathi dreadnought really 22 kilometers long?
A: Yes, False Colors says so.

Q: Dragon or Lance?
A: Either one is fine. 'Lance' is the official name, and 'Dragon' is the accepted one. Like how the A-10 Thunderbolt II is usually called the Warthog.

Q: I don't like that at all!
A: Nobody cares.

Q: The movie doesn't fit with the games!
A: If you want to know how it might, we'll be happy to talk with you about it. If you just want to complain, just deal with it.

Q: Why'd they change the ship designs!?
A: Ten pixel by ten pixel images look sucky on a 30 foot high screen.
 
Q: Does that LOAF guy REALLY know everything there si to know about Wing Commander?
A: Not everything, but about as close to it as a naturally-conceived human CAN know...
 
HAHAHA

I´d add the most FAQ from the Tech Support section, I get these a lot there:

Q: I have WinXP. How do I run the DOS-based WC games?
A: Make a boot disk from a Win98 computer and use it to boot your computer in DOS.

Q: I want to play them straight from WinXP, not from DOS. Can I do that?
A: No.

Q: But I do not have Win98. How do I make that boot disk?
A: <sigh> Ask some friend/neighbor / relative who has Win98.

Q: Ok, I made a boot disk but the games still don´t work.
A: Please post your autoexec.bat and config.sys and we´ll help you out.

Q: Post WHAT?
A: (oh, no). Go to your root folder in drive a: (a:\), find those files and post them here.

Q: Ok, here goes:
file://a:\autoexec.bat; file://a:\config.sys
A: No, don´t link them here, it´s useless, copy their content and post it here.

Q: Oh, sorry, here goes:
config.sys date: 01/05/99 size: 240kb last modified: 01/05/99
A: aaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrggggghhhh
 
Originally posted by Bandit LOAF
Q: Which Wing Commander girl do you want the most?
A: The Green Salthi.
Click to expand...

Hmm, I would have thought it would have been the news anchor from WC4........


Q: Does that LOAF guy really buy everything off of EBAY?
A: YES. Anything worth buying he buys.
 
Q: If ships travel at hundreds of kilometers per second, why don't we whiz past cap-ships?
A: Capships are really thousands of kilometers long.

Q: Seriously?
A: No. Ships in the Wing Commander universe travel at 'Kilometers Per Second Relative', which means that the only time a Ferret is actually travelling at 500 kps is when it's going in a straight line in deep space with enough spaceborne hydrogen to fuel it. In combat ships are much slower (look at the VDUs in Wing Commander 2 -- target distances are in meters, nav point distances are in kilometers).

Q: Wait, that doesn't make a lick of sense.
A: It's best not to think about it.

Q: What the heck is "Super" Wing Commander? Isn't that redundant?
A: I like that enthusiasm! Super Wing Commander was a 1993 remake of the original Wing Commander for the 3DO and Macintosh platforms. It has redone graphics, added plot elements, different cut-scenes and full speech. It includes the Vega Campaign, Operation Thor's Hammer and an all-new set of missions about destroying Kilrathi shipyards.

Q: Who's the best fighter pilot ever?
A: Bacon Boy.

Q: Extra scenes in WC3? Where are those from?
A: The 3DO and PSX versions of WC3 feature a number of 'cut' scenes, because their CDs can hold more data than 1994-era 60 minute discs. The scene explaining why Hobbes defected as well as various news broadcasts are included. The PSX version contains one more news broadcast than the 3DO release.

MINIFAQ - Movie Continuity

Q: Did you just make all this up?
A: Yeah, mostly. But it can put your mind at ease, if you care. If you don't, don't read it.

Q: Why does the Rapier look different?
A: It's the original CF-117 Rapier -- and it's been around for a century or so. It'll be replaced by the entirely new F-44 Rapier II in a few months.

Q: Why does the Dralthi look different?
A: It doesn't really look that different... no more so than the difference between the Dralthi II and the Dralthi IV. It's just another, earlier model (the KF-100 Dralthi).

Q: Why do the Kilrathi capships look different?
A: The Sivar is the 'carrier' version of the dreadnought mentioned in the SWC manual. The Snakeir is a different, larger version of the Snakeir from SM2 (like how there are several different 'sizes' of the blockade runner/transport/carrier ship from WCA). The Ralari and Fralthi are just older versions of the ships we see in the original WC.

Q: Why does the TCS Concordia look different?
A: It's a different Concordia -- the one from Wing Commander II won't enter service in seven years.

Q: Why does the Tiger's Claw look different?
A: A wizard did it.

Q: Why are torpedoes used?
A: Torpedoes are used throughout WC -- we see their inception in 'Action Stations'. Advances in gun technology make them occasionally less useful.

Q: But the skipper missile was *new* in Wing Commander III!
A: They never actually say it's new -- just that the version in WC3 is a prototype. It may just be a new version of Skipper.

Q: Why do the Kilrathi look stupid?
A: You try making talking space-cats that don't look stupid.

Q: Why is Paladin French?
A: According to the WCIV novel, any accept Paladin had was fake -- part of his job as a spy.

Q: Why is Angel British?
A: She's not... she's... Belgish.

Q: Didn't Knight and Bossman die? How are they in WC1?
A: We never see Knight die -- we just see his ship blow up. The theory behind Bossman is that he was captured by the Kilrathi and then rescued at some point after the movie.

Q: Blair's not a Pilgrim!
A: Can you point to any place in any other WC story where Blair's religion is stated?

Q: Why don't we see Pilgrims in later games?
A: The concept hadn't been invented yet... also, the universe is ridded of the concept in Peter Telep's two movie follow-up novels, Pilgrim Stars and Pilgrim Truth. There are no Pilgrims (save Paladin and Blair) at the outset of WC.

Q: Why do the characters in WC introduce themselves if they already know Blair?
A: The only two who do this are Angel and Maniac. Since Maniac already knew Blair in the games (they went to the Academy together), he's probably being sarcastic. Angel technically only asks you what your callsign is -- understandable, since Blair kept changing his callsign in Pilgrim Truth.

Q: But there wasn't any cloaking technology back then!
A: Since the Kilrathi would (in just two years) have fully-cloaked fighters, it seems reasonable to believe that they would experiment with limited cloaks beforehand (and, in fact, we see this in Wing Commander Academy).

Q: Tiger Claw or Tiger's Claw?
A: The original script uses them inter-changably.

Q: When does the war start?
A: The war was first declared by the senate in 2634... but can you really pin down a date? Did World War II start during the Spanish Revolution? Or not until Pearl Harbor? Or at some point during Hitler's invasion of Europe? The same can be asked of the Kilrathi War -- and thus multiple dates (corresponding with major battles) exist.

Q: Two Iason incidents? What?
A: The best theory is that the Iason was refurbished and that the Confed Handbook's description is of the destruction of the salvaged ship. It's actually mentioned therein that Iason underwent a refit in 2630...

Q: Then what was that 3km long ship in the movie intro?
A: Not the Iason.

Q: What's this Repleetah stuff?
A: It happens before the Repleetah stuff from Victory Streak. It's the part that Paz from WCA is from.

Q: Why does Obi-Wan say Anakin was a great pilot when they met, when in reality he was a little boy?
A: Clerks the Cartoon is stupid, Obi-Wan never says Anakin was a great pilot *when* they met.
 
PRIVATEER 2

Q:Is Privateer 2 located in another Galaxy/dimension/universe/continuum ?
A:emmhh NO, it´s just in the Future in an isolated part of the WCU

Q:Is that strange ship a Time-machine with the shape of a Talon
A:No, it´s just a Talon

Q:You are kidding they are so old!
A:No, it´s just a joke for the fans.

Q:Why a tiny spaceman is shooting me?
A: Don´t worry he is LOAF having fun with his spaceman.

Q:Were the Tri-system Colonizated by British people?
A: We don´t know, maybe a few of them.

Q:So why they speak with British accent, eh?
A:Because is so Cool!

Q: Is the bounty hunter (or whoever she is) the girl from Flash the series?
A:Yes
 
Q: I downloaded Secret Ops, but then my computer caught fire in an earthquake and then a monster ate it and then it crashed and I lost everything. Where can I download it again?
A: Die. Now.

Q: TEH MOVIE DOSE KNOT FIT WIHT TEH GAEMS!!1121
A: Actually, it does. And you make me sad.

Q: WELL I DONT BELEIVE YUO AND IN MY MIND ITS NOT PARTT OF TEH WING COMANDER UNIVRSE!!!1121!@1
A: That's nice. We don't care what you think. Feel free to believe whatever you want to believe, but if you're going be obnoxious and annoying about it, I'll feel free to bash your skull.

Q: Um... Let me think of a stupid question to post. Oh, I know! Why do ships look different in the movie?
Q: [EDIT] I double posted. Wonder how that happened...
Q: It's only been two minutes. Why hasn't anyone replied to my post?
Q: Hello? Anyone out there?
A: Post count whores like yourself need to be shot, stabbed, beaten, and burned. Shall we begin?

Q: 1 L1K3 +4LK1NG 1N L33+ 5P33K!
A: You also seem to like being one of the stupidest people here, don't you? Go away and take your number fetish with you.

Q: WildWeasel, why are you so mean?
A: Why are you so stupid?
 
Still from the Tech Support Sad (almost) Real Cases:

Q: I am trying to play Priv1 but my joystick won´t work and won´t calibrate. Help.
A: What joystick do you have? (they never inform it first).

Q: It´s a K-Mart 2-button SuperJoystick.
A: Well, joysticks are plug-and-play things since DOS 1.0, if yours are not working only with Priv1, it´s hopeless, go buy a real joystick.
******

Q: I´ve just spent 500 bucks to upgrade my computer to WinME...
A: (What an idiot)
Q:...and now I can´t play my WC games :( What should I do?
A: (Copy and paste from one of other 50 similar threads) You should make a boot disk in a Win98 computer and use it in your computer, WinME does not support DOS.

Q: That sucks. What is WinME good for?
A: It was released only to make fools like you help Mr. Gates make more money.

Q: Where can I find someone who has Win98?
A: Where can you find someone who has Win98?

Q: Ok, so I have copied the Win98 system files to a disk then I overwrote my WinME files with them. Strange, but my computer ain´t working. What should I do now?

Q: Hello? It´s been a week and nobody replied. Where are you guys?


******

Q: I have a Pentium IV 1.5 Ghz with 256 MB Ram, WinXP, USB mouse, my music and sound board are built inside my motherboard and I don´t know their brands and they don´t have DOS drivers. I heard something about making some "boot disk" and also about "config.bat" and "autoexec.sys". Can I play WC1?
A: According to the Theory of Probabilities, yes, there´s a slight chance, but you´ll have to pay us and the CIC for this tech support, since this problem will take 1,500 posts to be solved and they have "limited bandwidth and server space" and our patience is even smaller. Now first, go find someone who has Win98 and make a boot disk.

Q: I live in Greenland and there´s no one in a 1,000 mile radius.
A: Well, then I hope some polar bear cracks into your igloo and rip your head away from your torso. Goodbye.
 
Originally posted by Starkey
Still from the Tech Support memorabilia:

Q: It´s a K-Mart 2-button SuperJoystick.
A: Well, joysticks are plug-and-play things since DOS 1.0, if yours are not working only with Priv1, it´s hopeless, go buy a real joystick.
Click to expand...


The older joysticks are better to play with Priv


Originally posted by Starkey
[BQ but you´ll have to pay us and the CIC for this tech support, since this problem will take 1,500 posts to be solved and they have "limited bandwidth and server space" and our patience is even smaller. Now first, go find someone who has Win98 and make a boot disk.
[/B]
Click to expand...


*Paying us* ???
WTH do you think that you are, Mr. Repairman?
You are not a shadow of Johnl12!
And certainly you don´t pay the bandwidth ussage here!
Ah!
*And our patience is even smaller And go find someone who was Win98*

Who do you think that you are !
 
Q: (Ghost) The older joysticks are better to play with Priv
A: Then why do I see lots of people complaining about them?

Q: (Ghost)*Paying us* ???
WTH do you think that you are, Mr. Repairman?
You are not a shadow of Johnl12!
And certainly you don´t pay the bandwidth ussage here!

A: No one said I pay for the bandwidth. About John, I don´t have any problems with him, I think he´s the best expert in Tech Support. About the Tech Support charges, THAT´S A JOKE, moron, if you don´t have any sense of humor I can´t talk to you. Or do you also think WildWeasel meant it when he said "Post count whores like yourself need to be shot, stabbed, beaten, and burned. Shall we begin? "

Q: (Ghost) Who do you think that you are !
A: Someone who lives in a 4-time World Champion country where the KING of soccer was born. Don´t be harsh against me just because you are upset about having the 4th best player in soccer history. That´s life.
(I told mpanty that he would turn us into sworn bloody enemies, there it is.) :(
 
Q: What can you tell me about the Mystery Fish?
A: The facts of the Mystery Fish are unknown.

Q: Are there any Wing Commander references in Ultima?
A: Yes. In Ultima VII Prince Thrakhath's fighter appears in a field, along with a story about the "Kil Wrathy". In one of the Underworld games an anagram of the word 'Kilrathi' is written on a wall.

Q: What is it, that flies so good? Is it insane?
A: No, it's just got a load of cargo in the hold and a load of bills to pay at home.

Q: Where does Chris Roberts cameo in the various games?
A: Wing Commander - Shotglass mentions 'Colonel Roberts'.
Wing Commander II - Played Blair in the few 'FMV' sequences.
Wing Commander III - Voice of the TCS Coventry.
Wing Commander IV - Black Lance officer who 'Couldn't go on' (and the pirates helmets all said 'Roberts').
Wing Commander Movie - Lt. Chris McCubbin, the Broadsword pilot who rescues Blair at the end of the movie.
 
Q: Joystick, huh?
A:The people have problem with DIGITAL Joystick
Not ANALOGIC joysticks
The older ones are ANALOGICS
 
Originally posted by WildWeasel
Q: I like continually talking about soccer on a Wing Commander board. Does this make me a moron?
A: Yes. Yes, it does.
Click to expand...

(I did not start this)

Q: Why is Ghost mad at Starkey?
A: Because he is pissed off about the fact that his national team is always behind us and also that his drug addict was merely a 4th all-time best player. I thought he was over that but I was wrong. I shall not discuss soccer here anymore nor argue with Ghost, it´s hopeless, I understand his pain.
 
Q: Is Blair really 3000 years old ?
A: No. But LOAF is.

Q: When will Freelancer be released ?
A: When it will be released...
 
Q: Why did Starkey started talking about soccer in a WC board?
A: Because THAT was the real reason for Ghost´s unprovoked attacks.

Q: Do the other CZers have something to do with that?
A: Sorry, they don´t, Starkey won´t do it again.

Q: Will Starkey EVER talk about soccer in the CZ again?
A: No, even if Ghost keeps shouting his frustration in the form of insults.

Q: What about those Pele links in Starkey´s sig?
A: As of now, they are being removed.

(enough. This is a good thread, sorry everyone for the trouble).

Q: What is the new WC TV show about?
A: It´s a cartoon, or a "real" series, which takes place in the Kilrathi war, or not, with Blair or somebody else as the main character.
 
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