In an effort to cut costs, streamline our efforts and ensure the longevity of the CIC, we'll be soon be moving to yet another server. That's right, wcnews.com will soon redirect to my personal computer! The staff has been conducting a variety of bandwidth stress tests over the past few weeks and we've determined that my 33.6 modem hooked up through AOL should be sufficient to handle most aspects of the site. Delance was ecstatic: "Finally the CIC will be hosted on a computer with real Wing Commander experience!" There's been talk about cable internet service appearing in my area, but that should be unnecessary at this time. We may be interested in hosting subsites as well, contact us for more info.
At a press conference this morning Electronic Arts announced that their subsidiary, Origin Systems Inc., will immediately begin development of seventeen more Ultima Online products. Said one Origin rep: "The current market for massively multiplayer products set in the Ultima Universe is huge! Just one or two Ultima Online games is sure to miss out on a large percentage of the people who want to play an Ultima game online! We need at least eighteen of them!"
CNN has reported on a recent shake up in the United States Navy's chain of command, following allegations that Captain Johnny is "not a real Captain." Said an anonymous source at the Judge Advocate General's office: "It's a tricky situation... if he's a real Captain, then he can be in serious trouble for pretending to be a Captain. But if he's not in the Navy, it's outside our jurisdiction..." Admiral Frederick Long refused to comment on what he termed "an ongoing investigation."
Dear Mr. Asher,
My ninety year old father recently passed away. He was a good man who lead a full life... but now that he's gone, I'm not sure how to continue to go about my life without him?
It's important to remember this: HAHA! You're such a loser! He's dead! HAHAHA! I'll bet you think he's still alive! HAHA! LOSER!
Ask Mark Asher is the CIC's weekly advice column. Ask Mark Asher's Mark Asher is in no way related to that other Mark Asher who works for Gamespot or something. That guy's a *real* jerk!
As part of what was later termned "the year's biggest coincidence" IRC's infamous #W-C chat channel mentioned Wing Commander itself.
*** Sk8er58 has joined #W-C
<Beagle-1> I kiss you!
* Beagle-1 welcome.mid
<Sk8er58> did u see richard garriot left origin???????
<Sk8er58> and they dropped wing commander too
<Dana_Katelyn_Scully> I'm special!
<Trelana`> What? It's a damn spy!
*** Sk8er58 was kicked by Trelana' (Trelana')
The winner of this year's Heistand Trophy, an award given annually to the outstanding college marketing executive in the United States by the Downtown Marketing Club of New York City, has been announced! Mike Gallagher of the University of Massachusetts will be given the award for his suggestion that they make "lots more Ultima Onlineses." Commented the head of the Heistand Committe: "We're all really proud of this young man... he has truly taken marketing to the next level!".
Former CIC/WCHS staff member Dan Hadwicke has been eagerly awaiting April Fools day all year! Akkbar commented last month: "Oh, boy, I can't wait for April first! That's when there'll be an update to insult me! It can't come soon enough!" Sources close to Hardwicke dimsissed these comments as either stemming from a desire NOT to have an April first update about himself or as being somehow related to the fact that his pathetic life is still completely unsatisfying.
Next Five eBay Wing Commander Auctions:
Wing Commander Kilrathi Saga MIB - Rare! - $0.10, Bids: 0, Ends: 4/01,12:00
Wing Commander Online Alpha Copy - $10.05, Bids: 1, Ends: 4/01,12:00
Wing Commander -- Byydo's House - $7.44, Bids: 5, Ends: 4/01,12:00
#Wing-Commander Magazine for Men - $69.34, Bids: 9, Ends: 4/01,12:00
Set of No Wing Commander Novels! - $0.00, Bids: 0, Ends: 4/01,12:00