And for some Humor...

Discussion in 'Off-topic Zone' started by Concordia, Apr 8, 2003.

  1. Concordia

    Concordia Swabbie
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    Ever wonder about the Crossbow?

    CROSSBOW
    Class: Over-advertized excercize equipment
    Length: Couple of feet
    Mass: Probably 20-30 pounds
    Max Velocity: N/A, must be towed
    Cruise Velocity: N/A, lacks engines, must be towed
    Acceleration: Depends who's pulling it...
    Max Afterburner Velocity: Let's see how fast I can run...
    Max YPR: I'd say I could probably get 80 DPS
    Guns: None
    Missile Hardpoints: None
    Front Shield: N/A
    Rear Shield: N/A
    Front Armor: ??? cm stainless steel
    Rear Armor: ??? cm stainless steel
    Side Armor: ??? cm stainless steel
    Jump Capable: Should be.

    -Concordia
     
  2. Ghost

    Ghost Emperor

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    HA Ha Ha yousa so fonny.
     
  3. Wedge009

    Wedge009 Rogue Leader

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    Pretty scary, a NSW high school kid shot his ex-girlfriend with a crossbow a few days ago - went straight through her chest and into the leg of another girl. :eek: Amazing that it didn't go through any vital organs - last I heard both of them were in 'stable' conditions.
     
  4. BadNacho

    BadNacho Spaceman

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    Ouch

    Is there a bowflex fighter?
     
  5. TopGun

    TopGun Vampire Ace

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    Lucky Escape
     
  6. twiligh81

    twiligh81 Spaceman

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    I found this story on a site giveing out "stupid security awards"...

    http://www.privacyinternational.org/activities/stupidsecurity/

    _____
    RUNNER-UP - MOST COUNTER-PRODUCTIVE AWARD - SAN FRANCISCO INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT

    Shortly after Richard Reid's attempt to light his shoes, I boarded a flight from San Francisco to London on British Airways.
    Travelling alone, I was singled out by the computer for further inspection. The polite inspector informed me that he had to check my shoes for explosives.
    I dutifully removed them and handed them to him. He picked them up one by one and slammed them down on the floor with full force.
    Apparently, as they hadn't exploded, they were not dangerous, and he handed them back to me to put back on.
    Let this be a warning to future terrorists. Your explosive shoes may go off in the crowded departure lounge instead of on board the plane.
    _____

    Got me wondering... did this security guards name happen to be "Pliers" by any chance? :D
     
  7. Phillip Tanaka

    Phillip Tanaka Swabbie
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    Bet that old coot didn't know what he was doing. :)

    But seriously, airline security is a joke. Even if you don't believe the things like Red Cell and such, I can tell you it does from personal experiance. I swear this is true, I was able to sneak a knife past airport security weeks after September 11. Did it as a test when I saw my father off on a trip. Had I been a terrorist, I could have hijacked the plane easy. Dunno whether anyone saw the Flight 93 movie they had made, but seeing how they were able to take over the plane was just scary because of how easy it was.
     
  8. ChrisReid

    ChrisReid Super Soaker Collector / Administrator

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    Here you can't even get past the security scanners without a valid ticket. There's no "seeing people off at the gate" anymore.
     
  9. LeHah

    LeHah 212 Squadron - "The Old Man's Eyes And Ears"

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    Ill have to find the article, but News Of The Weird had a blurb last year about a very large man being arrested for drug charges while on amphaphetamines (Pardon my spelling). He broke the cuffs, slit his abdomen open and attempted to remove his organs to throw at the police trying to restrain him.
     
  10. Bandit LOAF

    Bandit LOAF Long Live the Confederation!

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    That's a universal rule now -- has been since just after 9/11.
     
  11. Worf

    Worf Vice Admiral

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    Heh. Airport security is just a laugh, really. It's a big show that really just gives people a false sense of security. Especially these days where you get to eat with plastic utensils because metal ones are hijack tools, and such. (And it's possible to inflict serious damage with the plastic stuff as well...).

    I suppose it's because people are willing to tolerate it because most of the people think it works (a la "patriot" act and other silly things that appear to do good work, but really just curtail rights).

    Of course, to keep with the topic, yes, a lot of the "security" measures implemented are a joke...
     
  12. Delance

    Delance Victory, you say?

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    Yeah, it's better to abandon it alltogheter and let people board airplanes with hand graneds and assault rifles. Or maybe not.
     
  13. cff

    cff Kilk'dymga'qith laq Ik'vikvi

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    In all honesty, probably yes. You know various TV stations aired experiments here about them smuggling in a grenade on various airports. None got detected...

    Sides there are even more malicious things. Like you can destroy a whole plane (ok, not instantly - might need months) with a household item that would never be confiscated.

    PS: You know that you aren't allowed to take a pocket knife or similar on the plane, but you get a metal knife for your meal on business class? Happened to me last week...
     
  14. Phillip Tanaka

    Phillip Tanaka Swabbie
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    A bread and butter knife, wouldn't it be? Not like a box cutter or something?
     
  15. Worf

    Worf Vice Admiral

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    Actually, my comment stems from a recent incident where I was singled out for "enhanced security". Let's just say I shuffled my bags and what not to the rest of my family, and I was just left with a laptop computer. To me, that's just Bad(tm). I could've hid other stuff in the bags I shuffled off...

    (Yes, I'm concerned about safety, but I also know "security" when I see it... Real security measures aren't what's in place after 9/11, just wishy-washy procedures meant to give the illusion of security. If there was a real security check, the public will be in an uproar because of it). Then again, it's just like the intelligence of having a bulletproof cockpit door, only to find that the weakpoint is where well, a crewmember has to use the washroom...
     
  16. Phillip Tanaka

    Phillip Tanaka Swabbie
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  17. Ripper

    Ripper Peace Through Superior Firepower

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    I am a for real TSA security screener at DFW airport. Some of the things we're doing are silly, such as taking tiny pocket knives, etc. The reason that it's silly, is because air travel changed on Sept. 11, 2001. The ability to hijack a plane with a knife, or anything unable to kill all the passengers on the plane, went down with the plane that crashed in Pennsylvania. I, and other passengers like me, will not allow a plane I'm flying on to be taken over without a fight. I may get cut up, shot, or even killed, but you are not flying me into a building if I'm still alive. I would rather die fighting, than passively be herded to slaughter like a sheep. And there are others like me.........
     
  18. Bandit LOAF

    Bandit LOAF Long Live the Confederation!

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    Hmm, but no one has hijacked any planes since this 'fake' security went into effect, right? For all the ranting about how it's all so stupid and how Mr. So-and-So once snuck a dangerous meally bug into a whojamajigg, there haven't actually been any more hijackings. Maybe the "illusion of security" is all you need to fool people who believe blowing themselves up is the best way towards career enhancement?
     
  19. Ripper

    Ripper Peace Through Superior Firepower

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    I didn't mean to say that the security was fake, or that it was silly. I just disagree with taking Swiss Army knives, scissors, razor blades, screwdrivers, wire cutters, wrenches, GI Joe's M-16, a transformer that turns into a gun, a "torch" butane lighter, manicure tools, cordless drills, etc. We even took a sump pump from a Buddhist monk. Crap like that is what I'm talking about.
     
  20. Lynx

    Lynx Spaceman

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    Austria. Not Australia.
    Jerry Williams, Arkansas, earned 14500$ after being bitten by the neighbours dog. The dog was attached to a chain, which allowed not much movement.
    Jerry hoped that he could gain more money, but the court decided it was enough because he provoked the dog by trying to kill him with a shotgun in the first place.

    Now, that's nuts.
     

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