Personal Log: Lt. Lance Casey
|I'm a little
distracted. Well, I'm a lot distracted. Jean was trying to ask me
something and I blew up. I know she knows that the stress just kind of
came out of me, but…well I hope this flyboy hasn't blown it.
She just…it's just when you hear this voice that sounds like a teenager trying to sound bloody, you can get annoyed. Even if you know the person behind the voice is one of the most precise killers in Confed, you don't always think about it. So, not thinking about her and only hearing the voice I…well…went BOOM.
Anyway, a good apology should help. I'll get to that right after I'm done finding ways of delaying it.
Why am I so mad, anyway? The Cap is treating us like garbage after the fall of Luyten. He thinks were capable of doing the impossible. I didn't want to lose Luyten, none of us wanted to lose Luyten. There are just some times in life you have to take the loss. We have to go through Sirius now, try and disrupt the Alien supply lines to make up for the loss and find a backdoor into Proxima. Hell, this sounds more like it. Cerberus shouldn't be attempting to break sieges, she should be striking the enemy where it hurts. I'll make up for every life lost at Luyten with ten aliens. Jesus, I sound like a ten-year-old. He has every right to treat us any way he chooses. We screwed up big and no amount of petty rationalization is going to make up for that. If I can help it no one else is going to die on my shift unless I'm told to kill them. I can't deal with the blame.
This next push should take us through to Proxima. This is where the 'sects are supposed to be massing. I hope so. The more I can cut through, the more sparks of dying fighters that I leave in my wake, the more of these bastards doesn't live to breed…I gotta calm down…
Maybe these tranqs will help me sleep. Haven't yet, just made me see things behind my lids that I want erased.
Oh, yeah...>Jean<…Can't forget that…
Sleep is overrated anyway.