INTER-SECTOR DAILY NEWS: CDC Advisory on Handling Nephilim Artifacts (April 1, 2022)


Space Marshal
In light of the disturbing Epsilon Sector reports concerning the loss of the passenger liner Blue Horizon, ISDN conducted a Q&A session with a spokesperson from the Confederation Department of Contagions (CDC).

ISDN: Transcripts recorded on the TCS Belliard describe people who came in contact with Nephilim hardware and then contracted an itchy rash. The ship's chief medical officer noted, "Subject(s) died as a result of extreme complications caused by an unknown viral agent 14 hours after pick-up." What should people do if they touch Nephilim hardware?

CDC: Well, first determine the length of the contact. If it was less than five seconds, then the five second rule clearly applies and no action is needed. If contact lasts longer than five seconds, then run your hands under a faucet and be sure to get your fingers wet. If handwashing facilities are unavailable, at least brush your hands off on your pants for 20 seconds.

ISDN: What kind of hazmat gear do you recommend?

CDC: If you can socially distance in your Danrik KN02 fighter, that's the best. These are certified by Crius medical officials to efficiently filter alien toxins, even in the vacuum of space.

ISDN: Some people are comparing the recent reduction of containment standards to the circumstances that led to the plague known as Malacreaux's Bite. What is your response to this?

CDC: The loss of the Io Colony was clearly the result of Akkbar's Doublecross. Retaining the three-stage decontamination process would not have changed the outcome.

ISDN: Finally, do you have any comment on the recent news regarding Wasp interceptors?

CDC: Yes, we would recommend pilots over 50 actually get a second booster.

ISDN: There you have it.

Original update published on April 1, 2022